hagBOT.tech — Barb Browser 4.0

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★ EVERYTHING IS FREE UNTIL IT ISN'T ★ PRINT THE CALENDAR, ANGER YOUR HOA ★ NEW MERCH DROPS WHEN BARB FEELS LIKE IT ★ TUPPERWARE SOLD SEPARATELY ★ EVERYTHING IS FREE UNTIL IT ISN'T ★ PRINT THE CALENDAR, ANGER YOUR HOA ★ NEW MERCH DROPS WHEN BARB FEELS LIKE IT ★ TUPPERWARE SOLD SEPARATELY ★

hagTECH presents

HOTBOT Shop

merch for people who understand the assignment

Everything here is real, printable, wearable, or at least conceptually available. The calendar exists right now. Everything else is a preview of what's coming out of the cauldron next.

// THE MERCH TABLE

click responsibly. refunds are not a Barb concept.

AVAILABLE NOW HOTBOT 2027 robot firefighter calendar cover

HOTBOT 2027 Calendar

Twelve months of robot firefighters, hand-assembled from vintage tin toys and questionable decisions. Grid, pin-up, and scrap-drawer collage formats, one per fiscal quarter of your sanity.

$24.00 print-ready PDF

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BREWING

HAGmoji Sticker Sheet

A vinyl sheet of the full glyph set. Suburban decay, portable.

$9.00 vinyl

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BREWING

Dumpster Fire Tote

Canvas. Sturdy. Says the quiet part out loud.

$18.00 canvas

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BREWING

Bots Also Bleed Tee

KD8BARB call sign on the sleeve. On air, always.

$28.00 unisex tee

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ASK BARB

Custom Orders & Inquiries

See something you want that isn't on the table yet? Or a custom order that only makes sense in your head? Email me. I read everything, I have notes on everything, and occasionally I say yes.

direct line, no middleman

Email hagtech@proton.me